The CI-Ho

Goin from an F to an A-plus I got another bonus, for showing my lovely cajonas,
upgradin my downgrade, from low-paid to overplayed,
you choosin to be paved over or ploughed under,
coward hunker, down, game thrower,
from losin your single cube dwellin, doublin up, yellin for my myth buster debunker,
cavin in for a whore-diving spelunker,
miss bigger buster punkin the office, lyin while lyin in the war room bunker,
cubin my square exponentially better, and wetter, my rainbow prism her colorblind prison,
her sex makin skills are incongruous,
while I'm making and breaking laws in sexual congress,
office politics my internal affairs, tanglin their heirs in my blonde curly hairs,
beggin to smooch on my pristine derriere,
pullin the strings on execs and board chairs, makin em my dolls,
while she can't even figure out how to vote for american idols, suckin down midols,
crampin her style and cryin in her stalls,
the bunkmate boss, her top-bunk state lost,
a retired playmate, she reset a date for a tired playdate, sittin sedentary,
said meet me in the career cemetery,
to take me down with her, a queer query, a homeless-homosexual--not that theres anything wrong with that—
oh hell yeah there is!
her fu-ture is all too few, and I'm all too sure,
my suck cess pool daze are over, not for me and my success school days, and class is in,
and my ass is in-genious, in-genue and ill enterprenue over your mascara’d massacred compact-car carcass,
I done graduated, but I'm sure glad you made it, I'm already out, elevated, all settin my clout, sittin in my clouds,
my pie is high in the skies, while her ounce of pound cake wont even rise,
I sent a no-thank-you card to her new unsuccess-full-of-suck address, shes 6 feet under the dirt,
But 1000 miles under my cute-ass skirt,
1000 wows surrender to me, and my handsome jet,
ridin first class not coach, rollin Coach bags over her samson-ettes.
The CIO has got to go, you know, you know, the chief-i-o, I don’t owe no mo.

can't keep my mouth shut, too much ideas are flowin,
from shining shoes to shining me,
makin love like makin money,
i'm deep purple bruisen from mountin her majesty,
I'm like howard hughes countin the rugburned asses and knees,
from you buyin me for a nite, to me ownin you outright, keepin it tight,
c-notes and esops, enuf fabled cash and hash to choke all the horses and whores from aesops stash,
my stocks makin sharp spikes, piercin your flat-linin mutually dumb plan crumb funds,
my 401k just made 401k today, while your savings account I can count on one hand, minus one thumb.
The CIO has got to go, you know, you know, the chief-i-o, I don’t follow no mo.

from schwinnin to winnin, from hikin to bikin,
electra cruisin my needs for deluxe, shimano shiftin all speeds for my fucks,
streamlined internal derailleur, matchin fenders and basket to bail you,
out of your huffy huffin, can't stop your no-name brand puffin,
can't give up what’ll kill ya, like me and my chillin, all
afternoon, watchin you break your back for a pack, a butt smack, a don’t-come-back,
red bulls drinkin me for more energy,
four loko’s passin out from seein my dreams,
while you sit peein on your phone, checkin for STDs,
while from my corner window, I think of…nah not gonna tell it to ya,
next week gonna sell it to ya.

Now the CIO’s callin, bawlin,
watchin the tech guys installin, some new fancy chair, can't see from there,
chief information officer is off the first office on the floor, out the door,
now chief in formation of what the eff happened here and no more,
new designer nameplates, bone china to his paperplates, new game plan, he don’t understand,
standin over me one last time, and I let him, forget him, where’d he go?
cause its me in the aeron chair, dreamin dreams out of the top story air, and away we go,
landin me next in the seat…of the chief e-o.

The CIO has got to go, you know, you know, the chief-i-ho, I don’t think so.

PMnM (P-Eminem)

P-Eminem (PMnM)

A paragraph of requirements,
single laughs of the choir men, iron men, volunteer firemen,
executive higher men,
the guys who said hire em, then lower em the cash they need,
we'll take this monstrosity,
outa the box, no need to botox,
can't believe it, just leave it, plug n play, so they say,
i sit around all day, touch my thing and play,
don’t touch a thing, and we'll pay,
the look and the feel, the price is a steal, wrap it up, rapped on,
raptor rancor, wrap your ankles, stifle your anger,
rifle your danger, proffer the succor, now offer the sucker, cmon.
this bitch is a one-n-done, a wanton won-ton of cookie-fortune fun-fun,
sex me in the sun, son, after dark hit the park, park on the bench,
do this bitch in my sleepin after the girls with curls in my dreamin done with their screamin.

from the back room, i hear, oh baby...

What the f? what the scope? take your fat bad teeth and sing for the pope!
maybe we can make one change,
Exchange, rearrange, hold the champagne, the real pain, the reel to reel explains,
The look looks ok, but the feel feels like felt, now the look looks like shit, can't keep any of it,
No man we can't, no mendicant, no supplicant, no supple no subtle no tweaks no peeks,
its all got to go, then we need to add more, and then mo,
then a new place to store it, cant store crap in the sto,
can you, sir, can it sir, canister, plant it here, planet earth can't hold this much new shit,
designin zion, flyin blue-skyin,
but with no aero-plane, no parachute, no suit, no suitable land to land,
cryin in my boxed wine, my goldiloxed young women,
wild flummoxed red ones, re-done, re-wind, resign, or re-design and keep tryin,

from the back room, i hear, maybe...
 
fuck excel! my egg-cell has salmonella, sell me an enema,
lost all my sheets, my books, microsoft crooks,
the client in an hour, now I don’t even have power,
hes gonna kill me more,
was it a million, or 3 or 4, was it dollars or hours,
or yours or mine,
I gotta run, a post-it note number,
a make it up number,
take down my own dumber number back,
first a shot of jack make me warm and, i can at least feel a bit...number.

my team of number generators, gleen and ween a guesstimator hesitator,
my estimater-hater, issue-anticipator negater,
optimistic dollar and cent raper, bleed on my graph paper,
greed of my assumption berater, the gamecock bear-baiter,
the holier than mao mosque-hater,
wholly erstwhile steroid perpetrator,
roger wants clemency, jennife-r-word, the retard, more hennessey,
girl with a tattoo is draggin her ass,
the dragon test manager is always tapped last,
all While I take a wiki-leak, to prove my undying purity, my always-pryin maturity,
Eat pray and love away, all the oil in the gulf to stay,
all the assistance from the assistants,
all in the ass stance, the lap dance,
intern wannabes, internal sweater set GOPs,
palin, schlessinger les-bees, loveless love child,
childless true blood wild, enjoyin joran,
van der sloot, cant stand her no-name brandless suit,
trying to slander who, innocent bystanders, too,
in a sin tent, stoop low with a girl scout troop flow,
dead lines circlin overhead, alive and kickin at us,
more mathematics,
my manual something beats your auto-sum nothing,
add-on formula, complex variables, circular reference, my preference,
my expression is a very able form of numbness,
i issue a rough order of plenitude, a rush order of magnitude,
not enough numbers in the universe, or worse,
adjust, then re-adjust, a low-numberless lust,
hello buttonless bust,
reaffirm, confirm, kind of firm,
hire the ex con firm, they havent conformed, continue, contentious, all drunkard and tenuous,
pay a hundred the same as ten o' us,
the hardline minimum wage, soft as wet soap if theyre in a cage,
pay em overseas, too, more overhead to oversee, for you, overtly be a virtual me,
a vulture of teams, rows of assets to ream,
waitin for the project to die, askin how much not the why,
ever so slightly, increasin the r on the i.

from the back, i hear, oh geez

Excel, exhale, exhume, excuse the f outa me,
now get the f outa MY conference room, see-
I need a sign out front? a guard, a lock on the door? messin with my team of low-price hi-tech whores?
Paid consultants, contractors, don’t care who they hack for, dont know where they from exactly,
Speaky the en-glayche, just sit in your cache, me breaky the glayche in case if'n I need-ya, capiche-a?
you do the needful, while I do the Gleeful,
Run you outa town before bonuses come around,
Maybe call you next weekend, if my teams all weak, an' what color my next geekin?
work for more or less, or on who or whatever, I tell ya,
get off your back, leave out the back, don’t come back, your moneys on the dresser.

from the back, i hear, si si

Sick signals, stick symbols,
Visio ho’s and horrific schedules,
Six sigma,
six pack of abs and nice-to-haves,
like weekends and holidays, a thing of the past,
a blue ribbon for drinkin so much pabst, pitchers of mgd, yuengling and bass,
code and unit test, diagrammed construction, precision instruction,
you hit your due dates and i hit my two dates, reviewing her rear view, from my cubicle purview,
review your code later, another intern to dater, today her, to stay and slay then spray her,
my monday morning quarter back is half in the sack ridin all your test script writin chick pack,
your friday's status, like youre mad-at-us, matador of code, mat of whores of old,
sat on us, come n stay and play, and saturday, work a lil late.

no time for testing, for besting, we trust in you,
like a u-s dollar, a greenback, a wetback, it fails, give you a holla,
avatar special effects, smoke test the smoke and mirrors the best,
we're all james cameron, same scammer on,
these are features not my defections, put on your glasses to see all the dimensions,
preachers sermon disinfects, disaffects, distracts, keep tracks, dock your pay,
go away, get another name, come back the next day, you all look the same.
get that shit out the door,
don’t wanna see it no more,
give me one more full pour,
then give the reins to Support.

from the back, i hear, oh gawd no, please

wheres my bonus, on time, overtime,
overpayed, got laid, under,
run over by the project life cycle,
an icicle in my eye, sickle to my spine,
you shove it, you can budget, but you can't budge me,
awards, a war, worst words of the sponsors, or enemies,
now for the upgrade, we're too late, the market tanked,
dutifully thanked,
thankfully spanked,
end users pranked, they eat love and prayed all day,
the old system would stay, anyway.

from the back, i hear, so...my annual increase?

if love is a battlefield…

if love is a battlefield…




then this is armegeddon,

an uncivil war of two worlds,

a fight hg wells couldn’t divine,

a peace i m pei couldn’t design,

all from two words yelled between us,

a hazmat suit to clean us,

a verbal bar brawl,

a chaste slap in the face,

kinda hard, like quandahar,

case of red bull, in case another kabul, all goin so jalalabad,

so baghdad, but sock your mama,

tikrit, to cross, too cool for school,

mcchrystal on meth, could kill you ten ways with his cool,

enemy or supporter,

but like you can only hurt himself with a reporter, recorder,

walter winchell, ben bradlee, all happily waterboard ya,

to get the answers no one wants to hear,

a knife in my ear, an najaf to my rear,

car bombs in my heart,

karbala fall apart, pop tart pull apart,

disintegrate, into whats great,

emasculate, perambulate, unlock the flood to watergate,

but what can you do, lounging in the shade of your star and gaz-atte,

3 hundred channels, porn, foreign, chunneling into your life from your double-wide satell-ite,

you sit and flagellate, flatulate, but all too late,

to implicate the dude from kate plus eight?



thats you,

an unreal reality, on every night,

broadcasting broads casting their net,

bachelor, bachelor-ette is enough,

adam rich adam sandler a damn handler for my money,

my leaving you, while your eve-ing me, your adamant adam ant man.

who is the winner, the wars not over, the whores comin over,

but she doesnt have to stay with us, betray us,

burn a hotline to general petraeus,

prolly he could parlay us, some cease-fire,

parlez vous france’ us, some sapphire, some sap for hire,

some way to get us, and save us, confuse and confucius,

darth vader dark side darfur space invade us,

leaning on a lenient lent, on borrowed time we’ve already spent,

pompous, pump them, from hateful to heinous,

even immanuel kant find a straight line between us.



the revolution will be televised,

then youtubed and hulued,

digitized, re-stylized,

recorded, reworded, then purported to bein alien bein autopsized.



turn me down, i can hear myself.

Dog Eared Life

a dog-eared life


...............................
i have a dogeared life,

and no god danged wife,

got things to get back to,

some things id rather not do,

clawfoot tub in my bathroom,

got a room with a view, just for two,

so i can forget you.

especially you.



read the book over and over,

cover to cover,

prologue, epilogue,

but your dialogue’s last in my head,

from quote to quote, from he said to she said,

paragraphs of causation,

chapters of alienation,

and yet no exclamation, no interrogation,

only a lost period.



sometimes a plain word says more than a letter,

sometimes a blank rage says it so much better.



I flip and and i skip, but cant find my place,

not in this world, not with my face,

not with a girl, with you girl,

in my story, we're not in a hurry,

linger a while on a blank page, draw a smile on your blank face,

seen making our own scene, laughter, then after,

the wind is obscene,

the window obselete,

ah the sleet, now the steam, and now we can write?

it was a dark and stormy night…

just start over, and start right, with a fight,

some fashion of passion, a last one, a lone gun,

unknown one,

samoan hitman with the snowman shogun,

more itchin, scratchin

correction of a verbal insurrection,

building your mentalese erection,

add complication to the hero’s medication,

before skydivin off to save the sioux nation, and…

what did you say? countdown to foreplay,

and youre at three and now you need me?

ive lost it, the plot, the idea, the will, the wont, the dos and the donts,

no motivation to continue, to read, or to write,

or to right the wrong words no one else will spot.

especially you.



sometimes a pained word says more than a letter,

sometimes a blank stage says it so much better.



my mind's narrator, to date her, berate her, separate her,

from me and my bold type face,

i embrace you, so i dont have to face you,

i hug you to snub you,

a chance to look over your shoulder,

overlook you and get colder,

ive grown older and wiser, so now I despise her,

squeezin you so i can look out and spy her, or her, or her,

or...hurry up and let go, so i can get goin,

turn away so im not showin

my smile, my wave, my goodbye face

you take as my undying love for this place,

standing here, stayin here, with you so near,

cuz the view, my dear, is so freakin niiiice.



sometimes bein plain bored says more than a letter,

sometimes the right age says it so much better.



your italicized thoughts, go on page after page,

i dont have time for that sh*t, skip a bit, bend the corner, maybe come back later,

better think twice, but i cant think a once, not of you,

lifes needs, and pains and gains sink my wants,

once and for all, or once just for me,

find another book, another store, another city,

tired of writin lives for so many people,

let them live or die, or for once, do the needful.

especially me.



sometimes a plain word…

sometimes a blank page…

Bobby Fischer, Playa Playa

No Match For Bobby


On Top Of The World, On Top Of The Girl

........

lifes no game, its just the same ol thing,

move here, jump there, do whatever the eff you dare,

you cant think 1 move ahead

your head cant move 1 drink away,

another skank in the rollaway,

to play, to stay, fold and walk away,

youre not the king, not the queen,

youre not even on the board, overboard, check your overpriced checkerboard,

overhyped sweater vest chest you scored,

watchin you tryin to order the pieces, order the pizzas,

but no peace is to be found, not in this town, not in black or white,

dark or light, the rules arent clear,

but i can see right thru you, severe, sever your intentions,

the wilke-barre/traxler variation, a ploy of stagnation,

hesitation, you go on vacation, til

your pawn sleepwalk to queen 3, beggin

my pawn to coldcock to king 4,

but i dont know what the f*ck your lookin for,

do you really want to hook my fischer king,

or you just trying to rule my world,

before i get too bored, before i get two boards,

playin meek with you and bobby's last week's whore?


bobby fischer,

keep right on looking,

cant beat him, so you cheat him, play him the fool,

he's 3 steps ahead--changing the game, and the rules.


bobby-f,

looking for yourself,

in high school,

with your high class high cool,

barbara streisand, all funny girl, not yet money girl,

neil diamond, sweet on caroline, poppin pimples and wood in gym class,

hopin for a look at the dimples, on her so fine---(a Bop--bop--bahhhhhh)

you beatin everyone in chess club

beatin off to the best in the chest club,

did you ever find who you were, or who you could be,

you want more best friends, or less chess enemies?

grandmaster at thirteen,

the youngest junior champ theyve seen,

the Game Of The Century, one medal of brilliancy, the young gm mc,

but soon itll be - 'the country that sent for me, censors me',

but not yet, sure, take another bet, sir, play for cash, gifts, even a check, mate,

almost two full years later, taking queens home before you date her,

not a money, or honey, or camera hater,

the breeziest champ, so young, and won the easiest u.s. champ-ion, peon,

peony for thee?

for the sweet sixteen, zoom outa the classroom, under the bad moon,

no need to finish that game youve already mastered,

in your head, in bed,

sped-read all that bastard could teach you, or preach you,

nobody there that could beat you, or reach you,

so off to play the world instead.


bobby fischer,

keep right on looking,

cant beat him, philander, thru eternity,

hes 3 steps ahead--scan her, cant prove paternity.


nineteen, and defend your national titleness,

knight takes queen, cant comprehend casual idolness,

cover of Life, and Sports Illustrated,

not a model or daughter you havent dated, sedated,

11 to nil, their can't to your will,

hidden decanter of imported swill,

those patzers are not just lost,

beaten up, closed down by your open from Landstrasse,

you hittin the hard sauce, double-dippin the girl floss,

gambits from Bishop and Binko, you dont know how to let go,

like theyre playing the wrong game, its not the same,

playin checkers and marbles, while you check and they marvel,

the whole country is un poco and loco, like your fast back in spanish class,

playin one eye on the table, and when your able,

one feelin and stealin a look at Caroline's so fine---(a Bop--bop--bahhhhhh).

1972, and you,

Spassky from the Soviet U-nion,

speeches, cold war nukes get a-move on,

media leeches, cia spooks get their groove on,

armageddon on the horizon, all gettin in on the fightin, the fright of,

in spite of, doomsday, death and destruction,

make war not make pieces take pieces, everyone

a pawn for their own evil empire,

a grandmaster gun for hire, berating on you,

a damn bastard, one higher rating than you,

all tighten, enlighten, knots in your head, not hiding, not dead, not yet,

castanets and clarinets, cast your net,

its not the care of the world he gets, its only the girl he pets,

he delays, wont play, not due to politics or commie tricks,

just boost the winner's pay, and he'll stay---(a Bop--bop--bahhhhhh).

the board set up in a hurry, reykjavik toward the sea, raise a glass, hennessy

rushin to another russian victory, twenty five years in a row,

but...never met the man that beat so many ho's.


bobby fischer,

keep right on looking,

if he can meet her, he'll land her,

hes 3 steps ahead--lay her down if he cant stand her.


you know he wins, smiles and spins, miles of sins,

you die in agony, hes got you diagonally,

go for the tie, the draw, sittin on the fence,

he stops you with the Philidor/Dutch defence,

fork you and your queen,

forget you and your dream with the the Latvian gambit,

the Ruy Lopez he says, while your sayin dammit,

home to the first chess hero parade,

all the pieces and girls that he layed,

a genius opening repertoire, an endgame to asian girls with alcohol,

endorsement deals canned, not yet banned,

not buyin what theyre sellin, not a grandmaster felon,

soon fallin off the map, a rip van winkle nap,

a nimble Torre attack, but on your daughter, you spot her, but not him,

no one sees him, or plays him,

nor seize him or phase him,

mising like a piece that rolls on the floor, under the door,

brilliantly gone, to be seen no more.


bobby fischer,

keep right on looking,

you cant find this genius playboy hermit man,

hes 3 steps ahead--all part of his comeback plan.


twenty years late, he pops up his head,

dead tired but not dead, retired but not retar-ded,

rematch with spassky dates, out of the states, title reinstated,

and even bobby stated, he'll go,

wherever they know, wherever they go, wherever you go,

ill follow you,

yugo-slavia, belgrade,

make the top grade, to get paid, to get laid,

you pick the stale mate, the cheap date,

he's pickin up another check, mate, for his teenage vixen,

japanese tricksin, phillipino mixin,

if on top, more teeny-bop yen, three and a half million,

but Bush number one says no way son,

allegations and sanctions from the united nations.


bobby fischer,

keep right on looking,

you cant beat him, cant make him not go,

hes 3 steps ahead--spits on your embargo.


he won again...and then done again, gone again, cash in hand, girl hand in hand,

per the government, can never be spent, a day or a dollar back here again,

his back near all us, and the U-S all 'you, no' to him,

his age and his asian friends conspire, against those in the tower, in power,

the rook not took, treated like a crook,

but he wrote the book on how to get out and book,

when backed into a corner, a coroner,

a coronation ignored by the rising sun nation,

the pariah son bored with night time visitations,

japan can but wont go along with his plan,

too conceited to concede, too right to be wronged,

he cant roam, cant go home, no castle or draw, no more pieces to move,

except to jail, a final go stale, mate, a standoff with a jackoff,

an endgame to the last game, dont play unless you know the way...

so a call to the ice world he put on the map,

made known to the nice world, his way outa the trap,

an offer to be a citizen, denizen, any city in, citizenship, cold and so hip, reykjavic,

and bobby only coolly spits...but where are the hot girls? (a Bop--bop--bahhhhhh).



bobby fischer,

keep right on looking,

cant beat him, so you slander,

hes 3 steps ahead, the newest icelander.